The Moe earthquake …

It doesn’t take long …

Sue reports

NEWS: “EARTHQUAKE ROCKS MOE”
 
A major earthquake measuring 5.2 on the Richter scale hit Victoria last night. The the epicentre was near Moe
 
The entire area was devastated, emergency service put the damage at approximately $30.
 
Several priceless collections of mementos from the Commodore Appreciation Society and the Moe Progress Hall were damaged beyond repair.
 
Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their welfare cheques arrived.
 
Moe Radio reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in the area.
 
One resident – Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said “It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Jerry Springer the next morning”.
 
Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
 
Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings. Police face an almost impossible task returning them to their rightful owners.
 
*************** HOW YOU CAN HELP ****************
 
Food parcels  – Required foodstuffs include, Fruit Loops, Kebabs, McDonalds, KFC, ice cream and cans of Tooheys Red, Bacardi Breezer, or UDL.
 
If you would prefer to donate money, 25c buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms; $5.00 buys chips, saveloys and gherkins, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9; $10.00 will pay for a packet of Longbeach extra milds or Horizon 30’s and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.